Ah... the many sinuous windings of life, the convoluted twists and turns of the serpent, half in and out of view, materializing and dematerializing, from one form to the next, each of them in temporary composition of that radiant energy, composed of it and animated by it. We view the transitory nature of existence upon the dream web. We attempt to interpret and to calculate it according to the registrar of the senses. They are the windows of experience, through which everything is, imperfectly, labeled and defined. The whole of it is no more than weaving smoke, shifting from one temporary presentation to the next.
My heart aches for humanity, forever building and tearing down, in pursuit of that perfect residence, formed ever nearer to the heart's desire and never arriving there... sand trickling through their hands, sands that were once cultures and continents and countries, now vanished forever more. Up it all goes and down it all goes. We wander and we wonder what and who we were before. We know the meaning of nothing and yet we have placed such value on it. It grieves us to lose any part of it and we lose all of it, over and over and over again. Why can't we remember who and what we were before? How can we not know where we are headed? Is it a curse? Is it a blessing?
I am led to believe it is a blessing because it is only the very spiritually advanced who are permitted such information and prophetic insight, save for the occasional anomalies. Some of us, for reasons, once again not known, have some amount of second sight, clairvoyance, clairaudience. Those with the powers, when asked, have said they are as much a curse as anything could be.
My early life was a horror movie and it did not get better after that. Even still, I could see many who were more unfortunate than I. I would have brief episodes of serendipity and respite from the struggle against adversity. Many were the occasions when I cursed my life and wished that I had never been born. However... all through the darkness and despair, there was an unflagging optimism. It was as if I knew something, something intrinsic at my core, so that no matter what the particular tragedy of the hour, I was confident that some brighter day would come.
How many times I was told internally, or given the sense, that I did not know at all what the meaning of my life was. I simply kept moving forward and by immeasurably slight degrees, the quality of life began to shift. There was still many an episode of trauma and loss... inexplicable, all of it, downright Shakespearean at times, but little by little, clarity began to intrude and now... I count the cost of it all as nothing, by comparison with what has been realized out of the strife and the striving. I now know that the difficulty was nothing. It is the objective and the intention that defines the worth of every action. I also now know. I know viscerally, that one cannot fail if one does not quit. Those words can seem like a platitude, something off of a greeting card and for some, they are no more than a platitude but... for others, they ring with authenticity and certitude.
We get caught up in physical passions and they consume us from the inside out. They leave us as a husk. Life is trial but... it is trial with a purpose. I did not know this at the time. I do now. We must court the fire of Heaven and let it turn our metal white. Then it is plunged into the cold water and hardened. This is what trial does for us. It tempers us. I now realize with fulsome gratitude that God was doing me a great service when subjecting me to the trials and the trauma that he did. It seems crazy to say that hardship is a blessing.
I could not understand why the gifts that I knew I possessed, were not bringing me success in the world. Now I see... intensified... what I have been seeing all along. Last night I watched the Academy Awards and I was truly grateful that I was not among these self adulating, self congratulating fire flies. Now I realize why it was that I could never stay around these people when I did happen to be around them. I am constantly reminded of scenes from Alice in Wonderland; "You're nothing but a pack of cards!" All the fuss people make about themselves, or obversely, the fuss they make about whichever celebrity they are obsessing over. You really have to be some kind of clueless to be taking yourself seriously at all. I think I dislike Vanity more than just about anything. It can hobble you spiritually. It can cripple you as a human being and make you a laughingstock in front of millions of eyes that you never imagined even existed. WE ARE ALL ON TV ALL THE TIME!
It is one thing to know that certain personal postures are unbecoming and to try to contain the demonstration of them, if you can remember to, but we NEVER remember to with any real consistency and it is yet another thing to KNOW VISCERALLY that setting yourself above the rest, only serves to make you are target of both public and private scorn but SOME OF US are gifted (or you might say cursed) with a total lack of awareness. These life forms are no different than the moths you see flitting about a light bulb or a candle flame. Sooner or later they get too close but they go crazy well before this.
The most amazing feature of manifest life is that which remains unmanifest. It is the secret heart of existence that produces The Sun, which produces the life, which produces the riot of color and sound that comes and goes. It is ALWAYS coming and ALWAYS going and it seems never to occur to so many people that they are here today and gone tomorrow and that what they did and did not do here today, orchestrates and scripts all that they will do and not do in their next go round and on all sides you see the present results of past actions and... and... people whine and complain about the injustice and unfairness of life but it is immaculately precise and fair to the last jot and tittle.
WE JUST DON'T SEE the origins of past causes which produced the outcomes of the moment but we DO INDEED see the origin of present causes for Future Dynamics of cause and effect. Hopefully I don't get hung up on the Byzantine twists and turns of my own words here. I suspect you do know what I am trying to say and I think you also know that there is so much I CAN NEVER SAY.
I never guessed I would wind up as I have, here in the latter stages of this go round. I've little of any greater material value but I do have all of my tools, some fine guitars and keyboards. I've a serious wealth of friends. I live in the absence of fear and the sure and certain knowledge of pending revelation and the descent of the quintessence, which is also called Spiritual Fire and known by other names in other traditions in other lands. I KNOW this is coming and had been reserved for a specific time. I've no apprehension that I will be in a state of want, mostly because I don't want anything material and everything else is an inheritance; which comes to every one of us WHO HAVE PUT OURSELVES IN THE WAY OF IT.
Because of the suffocating, wet carpet of materialism, that hangs over modern life we, mostly, fail to see the incredible spiritual blessings and opportunities that are present. It hearkens back to that mention of the unmanifest, which mostly goes unnoticed because it is unseen. Oh... my friends... such great changes are coming!!! I submit for your watching, two videos of travel through Ethiopia with this guy who travels for food.
You get insight into the lives of people who are at a far, far reach from your own. As interesting as this all is, that is not the reason I bring it to your attention. As I understand it, it is out of Ethiopia and Somalia that the locust plague is coming and which is hitting Kenya and other places. It is unlikely you have ever seen a plague of locusts. They swarm in the millions and they EAT EVERY GREEN THING. They are bad now, but after the rains, they say there will be many, many, many times more locusts and this means a serious hunger problem in Africa; something to bookend with the Coronavirus. When you imagine what may be coming to these people, perhaps these videos will make you weep. What these people have is what you have when you have Love and Friendship. What we have... is often something very different.
Here in America, in a dancing hypnotic trance of Materialism, the mass of us twirl and spin in the false ecstasies of our appetites... eating... and drinking... and hungering after one another, as if in one exotic form or another, we might gain surcease, or peace... It is a tranquility that will never come in such actions and environs. The more we have, the less peace and joy will we possess. The richer we are, the more paranoid and selfish we become. THERE ARE LAWS HERE! THERE ARE LAWS THAT CONTROL THESE STATES OF BEING.
Yes... there was a time I considered myself one of the unfortunate people here. Trouble came at me from every side. I did not know which way to go and when I did go, I went in the wrong direction (grin); true story. Yet there was a purpose here. There was a grand design, a sculpture, if you will, that God hewed out of the hard granite of my resisting ignorance. Now I see, upon closing my eyes, the undying splendor of the Kingdom of God. The spiritual waters of the Divine Mother flow over and through me, restoring purity and regenerated innocence and I know this to be true because... I will walk in no other direction. I will countenance no other result. It is the fixed directive of my every effort and thought. God IS the living reality of every life that recognizes the presence!
My friends... do not let the darkness come upon you. Let your attention be upon the inner light that animates and inspires you. The first of these is intrinsic. The second is a matter of choice.
I leave you with one last video from the irrepressible Mark Wiens.
♫ Cast Your Music on the Wind ♫ (This is from back when I first started recording and didn't have the computer savvy or the musical chops; I still don't have those (grin).)
I'm considering no longer posting on Pocketnet. There are some fine people there and there are some spiteful types whose only pleasure comes from giving harm and I've no use for that. If people want to find me, they can always come here.